The Machete

I have learned many uses for the Machete here.
1) scratch your head
2) when your weave is itchy you kinda slap the point of your machete to the spot that itches and wiggle it around
3) wack a friend when they have made a joke about you
4) cut your fingernails
5) cut your toenails
6) scrap dirt and stuff from under your fingernails
7) scratch your leg so you don't have to bend over and use your hand
8) hacking the head off a bull
9) cutting palm branches
10) using it as a can opener